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Funny notes about signs

    Aries: I have to go before I put your head through a wall.
    Taurus: If you want to receive E-mails about my upcoming shows... please give me money so I can buy a computer.
    Gemini: You love divorce so much that you′re probably gonna marry it... and then it won′t work out so you′re gonna have to divorce it. I′m so drunk.
    Cancer: Everybody looks so happy. I hate that!
    Leo: You should see me when... oh actually, no, I look pretty good.
    Virgo: One really does have a stick up one′s ass. Doesn′t one?
    Libra: Oh you like that? You should hear my phone number.
    Scorpio: Come on, Will. Take off your shirt and tell us.
    Sagittarius: DAMN YOU REF, YOU BURN IN HELL!
    Capricorn: I′m very wise, I know.
    Aquarius: If we were in prison, you guys would be, like, my bitches.
    Pisces: Your love is like a giant pigeon, crapping on my heart.

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